BEST LAID INDUSTRY-LED PLANS

So, I was performing my daily scan of The New York Times last Thursday and came across the interesting headline In Mortgage Plan, Lenders Set Terms. Here's how it starts ...

At least one thing is clear about President Bush’s plan to help people trapped by the mortgage meltdown: it is an industry-led plan, not a government bailout ... Although Mr. Bush unveiled the plan at the White House on Thursday, its terms were set by the mortgage industry and Wall Street firms. The effort is voluntary and it leaves plenty of wiggle room for lenders. Moreover, it would affect only a small number of subprime borrowers.

It's amazing to me how a couple of sentences can so clearly define the problem with an entire [Bush] administration. How doth it define it? Let me count the ways:

1) "it is an industry-led plan" - Like all of Bush's roads to hell, it is paved with industry intentions. Anyone remember Cheney's super-duper-secret energy task force? Or how about the recent prescription drug plan? The problem, of course, with the industry making the plan is that the plan will only help the industry. This may reek of common sense; yet it is the normal way of doing business for these people. Can't wait to see what the oil industry comes up with to solve our global warming crisis.

2) "not a government bailout" - As I mentioned in a previous column, it's funny how Bush won't bailout suffering people, but he's more than happy to jump in and bailout corporations. The term government bailout is too close to the word welfare in their eyes, so we have to make sure and emphasize that it is surely not that. We are happy to give billions of dollars in no-bid contracts to companies like Blackwater, Halliburton, and Titan. But god forbid we throw a couple bucks to some poor sap who was duped into a crappy loan and will soon lose his home.

3) "The effort is voluntary" - Bush just loves to make all his mandates voluntary. You own a huge power plant that spews tons of CO2 and mercury into the air every year? Well, you better clean it up, buddy! Of course, it's voluntary, so if you don't feel like it, that's just fine. Give me a break.

4) "it would affect only a small number of subprime borrowers" - What, my industry-led, voluntary, non-government bailout program won't really help anyone? Shocker!

All I can say is that this is the government you get when it is led by a man who bases his programs on faith, gut instinct, cronyism, and political ideology ... instead of what works.